Petals of Stone



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Hurrying through the corridor, Duo realized he had an hour before his presence was needed at the athletic track again and he wanted to get a clean, fresh shirt. He barged into the dorm room without knocking, and almost skidded to a halt when he saw Heero sitting on his bed, laptop glued to his knees.

"I'm sorry," Duo mumbled, then quickly grabbed a clean shirt from his cupboard. Even though all students were obliged to wear the uniform at all times, he usually wore a white shirt under it; when the rim peeped out, it reminded him of the priest garb he used to wear back on L2. He stripped himself of his shirt carefully, minding that the silver crucifix around his neck wouldn't get tangled into the fabric. He'd almost forgotten all about Heero sitting on the bed as he suddenly spoke.

"You're religious."

Duo halted mid-movement, before continuing to take the shirt off. "You have good observation skills."

"It's not that hard to miss."

"Everyone else seems to miss it."

"Why?"

"Why? Because they're not looking right?"

"No, I mean, why are you religious? Wearing that crucifix?"

"Because I believe in God," Duo answered, lifting up his eyebrows. Of all the conversations Heero could've picked to start up with him, he chose a religious one. What was the saying again? Keep politics and religion from your friends?

"God isn't here at this Academy," Heero said, keeping his eyes on his laptop.

"What do you mean by that? There are rooms designated for prayer and meditation all over the place, and every Sunday there are services here..."

"That's not what I meant," he answered, an impatient sound to his voice. "You won't find God here. Isn't every religion against violence? That's what we're going to be trained to do here -- to exercise violence if it's necessary. Gods who bring peace and love aren't to be found here."

"There is simply more to life than just live and die, Heero," Duo said, taking up his clean shirt and putting it on. He also took his black cap and put it on, large chestnut bangs peeking out from under it. "Many of us need an extra... dimension to his or her life, a place or an entity to find comfort and consolation."

"I don't need that extra 'dimension'." Heero shrugged. "Take refuge in any God is cowardly and easy."

"That's not it," Duo objected, his violet eyes narrowing a little. "God is support, not a refuge. It's a pillar in your life, to lean onto and find support."

"Does it support you in your daily decisions?"

"Believing in God helped me through many situations."

"Does this God of yours help you with your homework? Your assignments?"

"No, but I find the strength in God to do this homework and assignments, and to keep up with the education."

"You don't need any divine instructor. Your actions speak more for yourself than you'll ever know -- you're in the top five of almost every class, and you have lots of friends and people who like you. That's a feat you accomplished on your own."

"Maybe," Duo said, not knowing what to answer. What was he talking about? "Before I came here, I was determined to end up with only the best."

"And you did. You ended up with only the best, and it was all your hard work, not your belief in some kind of phenomenon whose existence never has been proven."

"What are you saying, Heero? That my belief in God is a liability?"

He finally looked up, staring back at Duo. "If I'm going to end up with the best of what this Academy has to offer, then everyone of them has to be without fail or liabilities. We are in a period that war can break out any minute, and I want to be sure that the ones with me share the same beliefs and ideas."

"That's quite... anticipating of you," Duo retorted, baffled. However, he was pretty much sure that Heero would end up with the best; he was the best mobile suit pilot in training of this Academy, and there were rumors going around that the Lightning Count himself wanted to train him -- unheard of for a first year student. Undoubtedly, as Heero already was the best of his every class, he would make a perfect soldier. A Perfect Soldier Who Wouldn't Ask Questions. Duo frowned.
"How sad, that you classify everyone around you either as a liability, a threat or a neutral party. That's sad, Heero. Sad and empty."

"Do you think so?" Heero continued staring at him. "What's so sad about knowing who you can rely upon? Your back needs to be covered, you need to know who to count upon during a mission. You can't use liabilities in times of war."

"We're trained to be soldiers, not mindless killing machines! We're humans, you're a human too!"

"You exaggerate, just like you exaggerate everything, Duo Maxell!" Heero all but snarled. "What is this, all kind of a joke to you? You fly through your classes without apparently any troubles, you get away with more than any other student could, you're big best friends with everyone and this is an international renowned military institute, where nothing else is being done but to turn everyone into mindless killing machines!"

Taken aback, Duo was for a few seconds speechless. "I take everything seriously enough! Who are you to base your whole opinion about me on a few things you've seen of me? I study hard enough, I work hard enough, and I damn well know there could be war any moment! The relations with the Colonies are fragile at best, and I've been witness to what the rebels can cause -- I know how burnt human flesh smells because I saw them burn to death. If you think this is all a large joke to me, you're wrong!"

"You're a liability! You need to trust your comrades, not some kind of divine entity, who won't come to your rescue when you're ambushed! You don't need attachments, bonds, unities, because in this world, it's about your life and your life only, and no one will mourn for you once you're dead!"

"That's... horrible!" Duo exclaimed, wondering for a brief moment why Heero was spouting all of this -- and to him in particular. "That's horrible to think, Heero! We are in this world to protect and to support each other, and those who think differently or have bad intentions need to be corrected, or at least heard before taking any action."

"That's a fantasy world you're living in," Heero snorted.

"No, that's the truth. People care, whether you like it or not, Heero. That's what humans do -- care and take care. Sure, there are exceptions to that, as to every rule, but the majority tries to live together. We're going to be trained to deal with those exceptions -- the ones threatening peace, the ones who are power hungry..."

"No one will mourn for my death," was the soft answer.

"I will."

"What?"

"I'll mourn for your death," Duo said, voice just as soft. "Because, no matter how you regard me, I regard you as a friend. A fellow student, a comrade, a friend, yes. I would mourn."

There was a silence, as awkward and strange between them as always; Duo had never caught Heero in an anything but Academy or assignment related discussion, and everything else was just silence between them. He wanted to know if the other was going to say something, but the silence remained.

"I'm sorry, I have to go," Duo finally said. "I'm taking this education very seriously, you know, and arriving late will have me expelled. However, I'm always around if you want to talk to me about it."

With that, he turned on his heels and left the room, breaking into a jog to get in time to the athletic tracks, carrying Heero's words all the way with him.

Yelling "You're a liability!" to him. Nice going, Yuy. Staring at his laptop screen, at nothing in particular, Heero Yuy heaved a deep sigh. Duo already left the room, going back to his exercise class, and it was as if he took every bit of energy with him, leaving the room dark and cold. Heero knew it was because of the policy of no heaters in any dorm -- as a soldier, you had to be prepared to be able to sleep in any circumstance possible --, and because of the little light coming through the small window next to the middle bunk. Sure, he could reach forward and turn on the tiny tube light above his bed, but he didn't care. His schedule wasn't the same as Duo's, or with anyone for that matter, and he'd used this moment of free time to work on another evaluation report about his simulated tactics class. He also knew he was gritting his teeth; Duo Maxwell was infuriating for some reason, and grating on his nerves. Why? Why in whatever deity's name, the same deity whose existence he fought so hard to deny? Because you're a fool, Yuy. Being able to strip a gun clean and putting it back together blindfolded under five minutes at the age of six isn't something to be proud of, remember? You don't even know how to get along with your classmates. "Because they're all a liability," he said out loud. As long as people didn't come close, didn't have interest in him, he didn't have to return the favor. People close to him would only worry him. He couldn't shake his previous training, indoctrinated by doctor J; an old man who saved him for the bitter streets of L1 after he had been wandering around for who knows long. Even he had lost track of time.

He was going to be a mobile suit pilot. He heard the rumors as well, that Zechs Marquise himself had plans on training him. He didn't care that people were comparing him to the abilities of the Lightning Count himself. It was his goal to become the best, to fight for what was right... no one differed very much from each other, right here at the Academy. Every student held up his own ideal, his own belief... and Heero's was the one of working alone. Oh yes, he would accept help if a mission was too much for him alone, he wasn't as foolish as Wufei to think he could do everything alone -- he realized the necessity of teamwork. Heero moved his fingers over the keyboard of his laptop, closing every program off. Where did Duo Maxwell fit into this picture? Being assigned to a dorm meant nothing but that; they didn't have to work together as they didn't even share classes... yet. With the progress of the semester, the fall-out of the students increased. Elder students always liked to keep track of the drop-outs, placing bets on who was going to leave first. Heero had almost betted that the two new students, Duo and Quatre, were also gone within the first month of the semester. Wufei had said something about the blond Quatre being a wimp, and his opinion about Duo had just been as low. The proud warrior however, had to admit that both failed to comply with his harsh judgment, based on his first impression. Quatre was more and more demonstrating of his leading capacities, undoubtedly strengthened by his family background -- after dealing with so many business issues, he'd developed a sharp mind with an unfailing sense for opportunities, be it in a strategic defense plan or an infiltration mission.

And Duo. Why was he even on his mind? It was maddening and frustrating. It had started at the very first dinner they shared; the wink he received was etched into his very soul. Sure, it had been a gesture in jest, but it had settled the relationship between them: not serious. Heero wasn't taking Duo seriously, with his foot long braid -- a liability, even though it looked so good on him --, his gregarious nature, his ability to make friends wherever he was, the way he was standing out in the middle of a crowd, no matter how large. Duo wasn't taking Heero seriously, or at least so he thought, because he was being reclusive and worked mostly alone. He had learned so many weapon tactics, but he hardly could handle a normal conversation, that had just proven itself, a few minutes ago. Still, feeling attracted -- what he certainly wasn't, of course not --, was another liability and a dangerous one on its own. Doctor J had told him to 'act upon his emotions', only after years and years of drilling and indoctrinating his views on liabilities and how to deal with it. What did the old man have in mind, back when he told him? Wasn't he negating the effects of his training, a harsh and excessive training, by telling him to 'act upon his emotions'? Wasn't it easier to stay this way and don't deal with those pesky feelings, that could made one feel miserable, ecstatic, sad, happy? Heero closed the laptop, looking at the silver gray object. A farewell present of said Doctor, and a very powerful and optimized one indeed. It was far more better than any laptop here at the Academy, but didn't look like one; no one had said anything about him having one. Most of the students were walking around with a laptop of their own... Quatre had one, Duo didn't... and there he was, back at Duo again. Was Duo... would he think of him too? I will mourn your death... He snorted, not wanting to keep thinking about it. Duo Maxwell would probably mourn the death of a titmouse.

The semester continued, and the pressure of the classes and the related work and assignments almost doubled. Students were groaning, working until late at night to get every report and evaluation done. Heero was the only one working ahead of his class; even after Duo had asked him to accompany him to a debate night or just an evening together with the guys in one of the recreation rooms. Even Trowa and Wufei had dark circles under their eyes; the latest week was spiced up with two nocturnal drills and every student who didn't make it into their mobile suit in time, was expelled. Zechs Marquise had personally attended the second drill, declaring this was a top priority war simulation; anyone failing it had no business at a military academy.

He didn't admit it out loud, but even Heero was looking forward to the one and only weekend of this semester. Having some time to himself without watching the clock or being on his guard the whole time would do him some good. He wasn't really surprised hearing Quatre inviting Duo over to spend the weekend with him at one of his many sisters, who apparently had a mansion a few hours from the Academy. It did surprise him when Duo declined friendly though determinedly, and he arched an eyebrow. Trowa was packing for a weekend away with his sister Catherine who worked at a circus that was traveling past the facility, and Wufei almost finished gathering his belongings. Heero wasn't sure what Wufei was going to do the whole weekend, as he suddenly realized it was him and Duo only in this particular dorm. Many students were taking the opportunity to get away for this weekend, meeting up mostly with family or friends. Why wouldn't Duo get out as well, especially with such an offer as Quatre had in mind? The Winner heir didn't seem fazed with Duo's refusal, and continued to pack until he was finished as well.

"See you all on Sunday night," Quatre said and waved at the two others. "Behave, won't you?"

"Get lost, man," Duo answered, laughing as he threw a pair of socks at Quatre's head. He ducked long before it could hit him and he laughed as well. "See you!"

Quatre wasn't gone for a second or Duo leaned over the edge of his bed, hanging upside down in Heero's view. "Hey buddy, it's just you and me now," he grinned.

"There are many others unable to travel or not in the opportunity to leave for this weekend. We're hardly alone."

"Don't start on me now, Heero," Duo said, smiling widely. "It's our first real free weekend! No drills, no exercises, no assignments for two whole days!"

"May I remind you that working ahead on cla.."

"No, you may not," Duo laughed. He rolled over, jumping off the bed and landing on his feet in front of Heero. "During this weekend, students are allowed off-territory as long as they return before curfew. What do you think -- let's get on a bus and go to town!"

"I don't have any business in town," Heero answered, as his mind processed the proposition. Getting on a bus with Duo, sitting next to him even though they always spiraled towards each other at dinner time -- he couldn't even remember Duo not sitting next to him while eating. Spending time with Duo... fraternizing between students, becoming friends... act upon your emotions.. "I can't," he said.

"You're so fucking lame, Yuy," Duo said, sounding impatient. "I don't bite, I don't kill... you, in any case. We only had one good talk, and I had to leave because you started discussion about religion while I had to be on the tracks in a few minutes time. We can get to know each other better, what do you say?"

"I'm not lame," Heero protested. "Not everyone is as fast as you in the department of socializing..."

"True, I forgot," Duo cut him off. "I'm a liability. I'm sorry I don't rank high on your classification list of your fellow students. You know what? I don't even want to go with you to town any more. Sit here on your bunk and shrivel away for all I care, Heero. I'm tired of being treated as something that's just not there."

"Duo..." Heero started, but Duo had already left the room, and as always, taken the light and energy with him. Amazed and oddly... hurt, he remained sitting on the bed.

With more than half of the students gone for the weekend, the staff was also diminished. Everyone seemed to have forgotten the normal rules of conduct, behaving and interacting rather familiarly with each other, something that irked Heero. He was more irritated and annoyed with him than everything else; he'd missed a great opportunity just because of his own stupidity. How could someone be so intriguing and infuriating at the same time, and why was he thinking about him so much in the first place? As if the other did the same... he snorted while walking with his tray to the conveyor belt for the dirty dishes. He had to get rid of Duo Maxwell in his mind; not only was he a liability, he was also distracting.

Fool. It was past curfew, and Duo still hadn't returned... at least, not to the dorm. He could be anywhere on the premises, as long as he registered himself at the entrance. Failing to comply with the curfew was reason to be expelled, and even Duo didn't risk that. So where was he? Heero turned around in his bed, knowing that this hour was extremely early to be in bed, even for him. He hadn't felt like watching TV with the others in one of the large recreation rooms, and there was only so much studying one could do in a day. His usual laps around the large football field didn't help much either... and tomorrow was another day off. Had Duo been able to slip into his life unnoticed, and making himself noticed when he was present and when he was gone? Fool. Heero wasn't so sure if he was aiming that towards him or Duo, and sucked in a breath of surprise when the door went open.

Duo entered the room, uncaring if he made any noise or not. He was mostly as silent as Trowa, who was able to walk soundlessly, really -- he'd given everyone of them a heart attack by popping up next to them without making a single sound. Duo moved through the room, shrugging off his coat.

"I know you're not sleeping, Heero," he said, to which he only burrowed his head deeper into the pillows. "Heero..."

"What is it?" he muttered.

"I owe you an apology," Duo said, crouching next to his bed to look at him. "I was overstepping my boundaries. I shouldn't have attacked you today. I'm sorry."

Off all things expected, this certainly wasn't... the thing Heero had been waiting for. Had he been waiting for something? They were soldiers, killing machines in training, told to follow orders... not human. No, not human.

"Why?"

"I don't know what came over me. I was a little upset, I guess, and..."

"No, why? Why do you fight?"

Duo frowned a little, but nodded the very second. "I fight for peace, and as long as I fight, no one else has to do it. L2 doesn't have any defense. The children... they're on the streets, without shoes, without a bed, without a home. Home is destroyed. I want to bring peace back on the colony, and make sure that prosperity will return."

His eyes... Duo hadn't turned the light on when he entered the dorm, and his face was only light by whatever moonlight the small window was allowing to pass through. Still, his eyes were as clear as daylight and Heero could see the honesty, the sincerity and the genuinely interest in them; Duo was real... as real as he could ever hope to be.

"Why do you fight?"

He closed his eyes, having anticipated the same question to be asked of him. "I fight for peace as well, and to make up for my mistakes. I was trained to be part of a rebel group, a long time ago. I didn't know anything about politics, about factions... and at one of my missions, innocent victims... a young girl..."

A silence fell.

"I also know how burnt human flesh smells," he said softly.

"I'm sorry."

"What?"

"I'm sorry, Heero. That's something no one should have to go through, especially at a young age."

"What about you? You had to be very young too, to know..."

"Yes, too young," Duo interrupted him, albeit friendly. "You know... every human here, on Earth and on the colonies, every human fights for peace, in his or her own way. Relena Peacecraft by talking, Heero Yuy by piloting a mobile suit, Duo Maxwell by stealthily sneaking..."

"The instructors are certainly very much enamored with your ability to get into everything undetected."

"And Zechs Marquise himself is planning on training you personally because you're the ace of every mobile suit pilot alive, at that tender age of yours."

He suddenly chuckled, and Duo laughed for a moment. "Hey! You laughed! I should post that on the message boards!"

"Quit it," Heero said, but his words weren't stinging. "You make a joke out of everything."

"No I don't," Duo answered, smile tugging at his lips. "The way we fight doesn't matter. It's the way we conquer that matters.. and that's hardly one on his own."

Heero turned his head more towards Duo, noticing that the other was very close. His eyes were vibrant, lively and sad at the same time. There was suffering behind it, loss... and a maturity he hadn't seen before.

"I owe you an apology too."

"No, you don't."

"Yes, I do. I didn't act properly around you. I judged you on my very first impression of you and never bothered to review my opinion of you... I said things intentionally to hurt you, or to provoke you, just to get a reaction out of you. The whole thing with being a liability.. you aren't. You're the top of your class, you..."

"We can't go against everything we've been taught at a young age, Heero," Duo interrupted him again. "You've been raised with certain ideas and beliefs, and you only act upon them. Something that deep inside of you takes time to change. As long as you believe something with your whole heart and know it's all right, then it's worth it."

"I don't know if it's all right," Heero pondered, lowering his eyes a little. "My instructor always told me to act upon my emotions..." The rest of his words were cut off, not by Duo interrupting him, but by Duo kissing him. The feeling of warm lips against his own, chafed lips, tasting faintly like alcohol, mixed with the unmistakable scents and smells of a garage, motor oil, mobile suit fuel, and something resembling blood, fire, life... before he realized it, he parted his lips to respond to the kiss, but it was over as soon as it started.
"I'd say your instructor was right," Duo said, a twinkle in his eyes, "but I probably shouldn't have done it. Are you going to kill me now? I'll defend myself, you know."

Heero knew his eyes were wide open, but he wasn't seeing Duo as he used to see him. The joking response didn't even grate him on his nerves; it was as if he was seeing right through him. There was no jester. There was no clown, no one screaming for attention. There was only Duo, strong, independent Duo, covering his own feelings with his ability to laugh about things, to make everyone feel better by cracking a joke, by taking away people's pain and discomfort by smiling.

"Duo," he simply said. A soft smile spread across Duo's face, heaving a little sigh of relief.

"Go to bed," he said immediately after, not scolding, not barking, just "Go to bed". Duo nodded, understanding, and stretched, getting undressed in the shadows and climbing up on his bed in complete darkness. Not another word was spoken.

Even though it was disappointing, Duo wasn't really surprised that Heero didn't mention anything about the kiss the next morning. He seemed to be asleep when Duo got up to dress himself, preparing to attend the early church service. Sunday mornings were for most of the students the only opportunity to sleep in, but Heero never stayed long in bed, no matter what the occasion. Duo grimaced a little, thinking that Heero probably pretended to be asleep, as to avoid talking about the kiss... even though he seemed to like it. Deciding not to dwell upon it, Duo left the room, reminding himself that one of Heero's theories about other people being a liability wasn't that bad after all... maybe it's better not to grow too close. He couldn't help but grin; it just wasn't in his nature to shy away from people and to be as aloof and reclusive as Heero. He was Duo Maxwell, one of the many cadets in training, but one of the few who would make it through the complete semester, even if it was the last thing he'd ever do -- he'd promised and he always kept his promises.

Evening rolled around far too soon, with everyone returning to the Academy, lamenting that their only free weekend was over. Duo caught up with Quatre, who surprised him with a chocolate bar that his sisters had given to him to 'share with his nice friend'. Munching on the sweet goodness, Quatre told amicably about how he'd spend his weekend. "It's back to strict discipline and structure with us," he winked at Duo. "Did something interesting happen here while the rest of us was gone?"

"Nah, nothing in particular," Duo answered him airily, seeing as Trowa was in the room, unpacking... and even if they weren't all in the same room, Duo doubted he'd share the experience of his kiss with Heero. He knew the Winner heir would be happy for him, not scolding him about 'fraternizing with students' or something like that, but... well, what was there to be happy about? He only had given Heero one small kiss and the boy was nowhere to be found. Probably scared out of his wits. Quatre tilted his head a little, looking at Duo curiously, but decided not to press the subject.

"After the mid-semester exams, Marquise's going to select those he wants to train personally," he said. "Who do you think he's going to choose from our class?"

"Heero, without a doubt," Trowa supplied, closing his empty suitcase and stuffing it under the bed. "He's scoring straight A's on every simulation."

"We don't get real mobile suit training until either Noin or Marquise deems you fit for it," Duo chimed in. "The mid-semester exams serve to determine your future career -- from their results, they advise you what to study and what field of training you need."

"Exactly," Quatre said, looking pensive. "Their advice is correct in almost 90% of all the cases. They hardly steer any student in the wrong direction."

"So, Heero will be chosen for the mobile suit training..."

"Along with the top five of every class..."

"And there'll be even a higher rate of drop-outs... mobile suit training, combat and engineering is one of the toughest educations."

"What about you, Duo?"

The question, coming from Trowa, almost startled him. "What... what about me?"

"Yeah, you," the taller boy repeated.

"I think, based on my achievements with the simulations and classes, I'm going to be selected as well. I'm going to try to get as far with the mobile suit training as possible."

Trowa simply nodded, curiosity apparently satisfied, as he didn't ask anything else. Quatre had finished dressing himself, as every student was obligated to return before the dinner -- and, the first rule of anything pertaining to the Academy, was to wear one's uniform all the time. "I'm quite hungry, Duo, let's see what's on the menu!"

"Probably something easy to prepare," Duo grinned.

"Like those instant mashed potatoes, instant peas and instant beef?"

"You got it!"

On their way to the large mess hall, Duo suddenly waved enthusiastically to someone he spotted in the crowd. "Hilde! Hey, Hilde!"

The young girl raised her hand in response, showing a similar grin to his, and quickly made his way over to him, clasping his hand. "Duo! It's been ages!"

"Yeah, too bad life here doesn't leave much opportunity to catch up, huh?"

She shook her head, dark choppy bangs flying with the movement. "I've been studying hard all weekend, I'm falling behind on my sociology and politics class..."

Duo pulled her into a quick embrace, after making sure that no one of the hall monitors saw it. "I know you can get yourself together and pull your grades up," he said. "Don't give up, Hilde. This is a chance only given to us once..."

"I know," she murmured, "but still I'm thinking that there might be more of a career for me behind the scenes than on the battlefield itself."

"There's no shame in that," Duo said, ruffling her bangs before letting her go. "I'm sure we could use a whole network of nifty spies and secret agents when war breaks out."

She smiled. "Thanks, Duo. Don't you ever let my whining throw you off course, got that? I heard nothing but good things about you..."

"That's because I am good," he answered jokingly. "Now, let's have some dinner, shall we?"

"Separate sexes, Duo," Hilde reminded him as he went into the mess hall with her, Quatre following. "I have to go to my table. Don't forget to keep in touch by school mail, and I'll see you around soon!"

Quatre took a tray and passed it onto Duo. "Here... you have to have something to put your plate on."

"I wonder where Heero is," he mumbled, not really sure why he was mentioning it now. Quatre picked up a tray as well and joined the line. "Was he here the entire weekend?"
"Yeah," Duo answered half-heartedly.

"I'm sure he's sitting at our table as usual," Quatre answered reassuringly, craning his neck to see what was on the menu today. "Oh good, broccoli!"

Duo made a face at the thought of that particular vegetable, when Quatre turned around to look at him, blue eyes staring at him. "Don't worry, Duo. You mean more to him than you think."

"Whu-- what?" was his only intelligent answer, and Duo had to refrain himself from dropping his jaw to the floor. What did Quatre know? Why would he say such a thing? While he was picking out one of the dishes -- beside broccoli there was also endive, vaguely resembling something snotty --, Quatre smiled softly. "Don't worry," he repeated, "I won't tell anyone, or will I ever judge either one of you for it."

"I don't know what the fuck you're talking about," Duo answered rudely, plopping a plate on his tray, not caring that the endive almost sloshes over the border. "Shut up."

"I overstepped my boundaries," Quatre immediately replied, even lowering his eyes. "My apologies, Duo."

"Yeah yeah," he all but snarled, took up his tray and went to their usual table -- where indeed, Heero was already sitting at. He didn't want to think about his conversation with Quatre, the soft kiss he exchanged with Heero, and he quickly joined a discussion about the upcoming exams with the other students at the table.

With the free weekend over and the mid-semester exams in full swing, life at the Academy was taking its toll on the students. Dorm rooms were cleared out as those who failed assignments or couldn't handle the strict discipline and structure, left the majestic building to never return -- the Academy would never accept a student who previously flunked. Dorm AD-45 was one of the few who were still in their original occupation; even though Quatre had his eyes on one of the larger dorm rooms, he knew it was futile, as it wasn't permitted to change dorms, even though some of them were empty.

"It's not fair," he muttered and everyone knew it wasn't about the dorm -- something that trivial was hardly worth getting all worked up. Even Heero was looking a little pale, the continuous strain of the exams, tests and assignments affecting him as well. Duo, along with Trowa and sometimes Wufei, used the large exercise fields as to relief some of their stress; running an amount of laps around the field was perfect for clearing one's head. It didn't give Duo much opportunity to talk to Heero, and it stung him that Heero didn't make any move to try to talk to him.

It was time to shower, and as Trowa and Wufei had gone before him, Duo was alone in the large tiled area, pushing at the buttons for one of the shower heads to start working. There was only one advantage to so many students already having left; he'd never had to wrestle himself through the crowd or fight for a place in the shower, at the lockers, in class... the downside was, that he also lost a few who he considered friends. That was life at the Academy -- and life in general. No time to dwell upon it, Duo figured. With the current political mess going on -- relations between the colonies and Earth were more fragile than ever, the rise of new factions who were using advanced armor and weapons --, life seemed to go faster by the second, and one had to make split second decisions; in war, in friends, in time. Duo pulled out his braid and allowed the water to soak the mass of chestnut hair -- no one had picked upon him for wearing a braid or having that much and long hair in the first place; he had shown himself to be just as good a student and cadet, or even better, as anyone else. Using the neutral scented shampoo, Duo worked his fingers through his hair. Funny how he started thinking about Heero the moment he had a little time for himself. Would Heero think about him too? Would Heero have any eye for the nicer things in life in the first place? They clashed with their opinions on so many things...

Caught up in his thoughts, Duo turned off the shower and went to the dressing room, wrapping a towel around him, whistling a non-descriptive tune. He had thirty minutes before dinner, a piece of cake if he hurried...

"Duo."

The voice in the room was unmistakable. His hand froze as he reached for the bundle of clothes on the bench, just momentarily -- then he picked up his shirt.

"Heero. So nice to see you."

He didn't have any problems with Heero seeing him half-naked. Not only was he hardly self-conscious, sharing a rather small dorm with other boys made you care less about what the other might see of you. Tilting his head a little, he looked over at Heero, waiting for him to make the first move... and couldn't help but widen his eyes in surprise as the other did make the first move -- walking over to him, and standing so close that their bodies almost touched. Heero lifted up his hand, pressing his fingers against Duo's chest, and he sucked in his breath -- what the...? Lifting up a finger, Heero stared at the small silver chain with the crucifix dangling from it.

"Your God?"

He made a noncommittal sound. "Why do you ask?"

"Because I'm interested in you... your beliefs, Duo."

"We discussed this before."

"We can discuss it again."

Duo glanced at Heero, dressed in a sweaty tank top and biker shorts; he must've worked out at one of the many other exercise facilities.

"My God is not the one you think it is. Leave it, Heero. We've proven already that we differ too much of opinion about this."

"Which God is it, then? Tell me."

"I don't..."

"Please."

Duo frowned. He had never heard Heero use 'please' before... just never. "Fine... the God I believe in is the God of Death, because all I saw was death and destruction, from a very early age until now."

"The illness you survived, was the plague that swept over L2, right?"

"Right," Duo answered, a little sourly. It had been world news, so there was no sense in denying it.

"Did many people die? I mean... many people you knew?"

Solo. "Yes, they did. It's a part of the promise I made; to return to L2, to establish a better society..."

"Dreams and hopes..."

"Fantasies and illusions..."

"Wishes and utopias..."

"Kiss me, damn you..."

Chafed lips on his. Raw, rough... tentatively searching, nipping as if they were afraid of kissing, brushing past his lips as if they were uncertain. Duo made a little impatient sound, pressing forward, his lips fully on Heero's, capturing them for a full-fledged kiss. The arm around his waist was another surprise, but certainly not unwelcome. Heero's hand slid over his back, fingers raking through the long strands of his hair, all the way down to the rim of his towel. His other hand went to Duo's cheek, cupping it, as he pressed himself closer -- need flaring, desire flowing, hunger exposed.

"Duo..."

"Don't..." Duo interrupted him, not giving him any chance to object, to protest. His own arms went around Heero's waist, pulling him closer. "Just kiss..."

"How..."

"Shhh..."

Touching each other, hands above their waist, Duo barely stifled a moan as he felt pure need oozing from his lips, the long buried wish for contact surfacing, and he parted his lips, offering everything he had to Heero, who hesitated only for a second before slipping his tongue into his mouth. Duo's hand went up to Heero's hair, fingers tangling in the unruly strands, tugging a little. So many sensations were running through his body, he could barely contain himself and he felt Heero's fingers moving lower, slipping between the fabric of the towel and his semi-dry skin and delightful shivers went down his spine... and the loud buzzer rang.

"Holy fuck!" He exclaimed loudly, almost pushing Heero away, noting the same aghast expression on his face. "If we don't get to the mess hall within five minutes, we're expelled!"

"Fuck!" Heero all but yelled, tugging at his sweaty tank top. "We have to hurry!"

They hardly realized how they managed it, but barely five minutes later both boys found themselves joining the lines. Duo's braid was more than sloppily and Heero didn't really feel comfortable in his uniform without taking a shower before changing; they both looked rather ravished and it was only thanks to the inattentive hall monitors that they weren't written up for their less than stellar appearance. Duo threw the plate in front of him as he sat down at the table, ignoring Wufei's rather disgusted look -- he was sure it was about their hurried looks and bad buttoned shirts than about anything else -- and glanced over at Trowa, who was occupied with reading some strategy book and eating at the same time. That left him only Quatre, who was smirking -- smirking! -- while he was eating, cutting his cauliflower in bite size pieces. Muttering under his breath, Duo hardly noticed Heero taking his usual seat next to him, until he felt his knee against his own. With a smile on his face, he started eating, stray strands from his braid slipping over his shoulder.

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Chapter 1 | Chapter 3